Cognitive Human's Tolerance to 'The West Wing'

Two secluded rooms with a single chair and television set were constructed. A living, cognitive, generally healthy human (Subject A) was put in one room. A dead body (Subject B) was placed in the other.

Episodes of The West Wing were played continuously for 36 hours. At the end of the time frame, Subject A had committed suicide. Subject B was in the same place in front of the TV.

Conclusion: The West Wing's demographic appeals to dead people so substantially, that the living are inclined to kill themselves.

Arachnids' Tolerance To Extreme Pressure

I smashed a large spider with a dictionary.

Conclusion: Estimated tolerance is inconclusive. Further test data must be compiled.

Tree Stump's Tolerance of Loud Music Whilst Driving

A freshly cut maple stump was given the challenge of driving its vehicle through congested city streets while enduring the deafening noise of industrial metal.

The stump was unable to tolerate the music and lost control of the vehicle, causing a 5 car accident at an intersection.

Conclusion: The local DMV has major issues with it's driver's license screening process.

Man's Tolerance to Shark BItes

A fit 35 year old male decided to see how many shark bites he could tolerate before giving in to the unbearable pain.

After marinating in chum, the test subject entered the tank. The shark took one bite and ripped the man's arm clean off at the shoulder.

The man forfeited immediately and began screaming and moaning in pain as he was pulled from the water.

Conclusion: Having a limb torn off by multiple rows of teeth turns you into a self-centered whiny bitch.

Bovine Tolerance to Open Flame

An 1100 pound steer was herded through a chute which ended in a 9 foot wide barbecue pit.

It experienced some violent and severe burns.

The bovine was delicious on a wheat bun and dill pickles.

Conclusion: Open flame was quite possibly the cause of death.

82 Year Old's Tolerance to Not Breathing

Mildred held her breath for 6 minutes straight.

Mildred's body surfaced to the top of her bathtub moments later.

Conclusion: The elderly should not attempt breathing experiments.

-------------------------------------------------------------------